So, to conclude our series on the burial of relatives, we would of course like to share with you P’s reply to one of our colleagues who was very quick at sending out advertising:
I would like to express my displeasure with the letter that my mother received very promptly two weeks after the death of her husband / my father. The fact that something like this is not prohibited by law does not, in my opinion, justify its use.
The cemetery as a traditional institution is – as you have no doubt noticed – under scrutiny. People are questioning its form, its usefulness and its necessity in general.
As a bereaved person, you are in the unfortunate situation of having to say goodbye to a loved one. The funeral director is naturally the first person you meet in such a situation. The bill is the first thing that leaves a stale taste. The flowers ordered from the gardener also raise the question of whether the price-performance ratio has really been maintained.
And when the initial anger has passed and you can calmly deal with the given facts, the stonemason comes unasked and reminds you with flattering words of the fact that it would be socially relevant to cast a memory of the deceased in stone. What else would the neighbors think!
This all-round profit motive pisses me off! We stonemasons should be the ones to set a capstone for the mourning. And at the right time for the customer. That can be relatively quickly, but certainly not after two weeks. If you create such unique STEINs as your advertising promises, then it is a lengthy process that requires intensive engagement with the bereaved and the deceased. You can’t do that if you routinely advertise your products like other salespeople advertise washing machines!
As a trade, we are “the last” in the grieving process before everyday life begins again for the customer. This is a position of responsibility that I would compare to the last song in a concert. It should be great so that the concert remains a good memory. Otherwise, the discussion about the cemetery might lead to its abolition, because the customer, who is king, will simply change his mindset after being bombarded with overpriced standard products and phrases.
Sideways glances from STEIN in August 2013.